Showing posts with label features. Show all posts
Showing posts with label features. Show all posts

Friday 19 May 2017

Ebube Nwagbo shares her View on Domestic Violence


BellaNaija - Ebube Nwagbo shares her view on Domestic Violence
Ebube Nwagbo Photo Credit: Instagram – poshesteb
Nollywood actress Ebube Nwagbo has taken to her Snapchat to air her opinion on the topic of domestic violence. She expressly stated the she does not understand why a grown woman would want to to stay in an abusive relationship. She also reiterated that emotional, verbal and physical violence are all forms of domestic violence and anyone caught in that situation should flee for their lives.
See screenshots below:
BellaNaija - Ebube Nwagbo shares her view on Domestic ViolenceBellaNaija - Ebube Nwagbo shares her view on Domestic ViolenceBellaNaija - Ebube Nwagbo shares her view on Domestic ViolenceBellaNaija - Ebube Nwagbo shares her view on Domestic Violence
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Cisi Eze: Men Also Suffer…We Know!


Our patriarchal society nudges men into hyper-masculinity. “Men are not meant to cry.” “Men should always be strong.” Most times, men experience ridicule when they show “weakness”; ergo, they are reluctant to air those issues that negatively bother them. They do not want to openly talk about how they are maltreated in romantic relationships, how they are harassed by female bosses, how they are feeling sad from the pain of a love-affair turned sour, to mention a few.
What is worse is that some men do not believe men can be rape survivors. You tell them a teacher raped her fourteen-year-old student, and the next thing you hear is, “I wish I were that guy! See enjoyment!” On a normal day, men void their pain.
Why do they remember “men also suffer” any time, every time, women start venting about how we face abuse and violence?
#RIPKarabo recently set Twitterverse ablaze. A man had murdered his twenty-two-year-old girlfriend. The killer had “necklaced her and poured acid all over her body”. Very harrowing! This coincided with Mercy Aigbe speaking up on how she suffered domestic violence at the hands of her husband. Somehow, these two events set into motion a Twitter timeline replete with threads of how women suffer several shades of abuse from men.
This brings to mind the Twitter hashtag that trended late 2016, #MenAreScum. Most of us used this hashtag to narrate how we have been harassed in different ways by men we know and the ones we do not know. Before that hashtag, most of us had been silent about these issues. Alas! Covering yourself with layers of silence will not save you. We vented. We let it all out.
In the midst of these tweets, some people tried to justify (or should I say “pardon”?) men for being mean to women. Some tweeted, “What did you do to provoke him?” “When you know how someone is, you should not annoy the person.” Among these were the ones that embodied, “men also suffer.”
Of course, men also suffer.
2015. Evening. Interior of a bus
(Random man sitting by my side takes a large bite off the paw-paw he is holding. He hungrily chews on it. He turns to look at my friend drinking from a bottle of soft drink.)
Man: (Points at her drink) This one is better. It does not have sugar. The bitterness is good.
Me: I really do not know about how much sugar is in here, but eating fruit is better. I should have gotten a fruit just that I can’t wash it until I get home.
Man: Home. (Countenance changes) I don’t like going home. My wife is terrible.
And that was how this man opened up to tell my friend and I about how his home had become hell. Truly, four walls do not make a home. He was bitter. There I was wondering why anyone would want to treat another human being in such a cruel manner.
I will not pretend men do not suffer abuse. A friend, who used to be my lecturer, told me he was “assaulted” by an older woman. He did not even want to say “rape”. Another recently told me his first sexual experience was via rape. There are men, who have wives that cheat on them emotionally, too. I could go on and on about how men suffer.
Men also suffer; however, can men not talk about how they also suffer when women are talking about how they suffer? All that “suffer”!
Talking about how “men also suffer” when women come out to talk about their experience is tantamount to saying, “Will you keep quiet? Men also feel the same pains you feel.”
Women come out, air their issues, build conversations around these issues, and suddenly, some men that nullify abuse against men come forth to say, “men also suffer”. They say (or type) this banality with such aplomb and one is tempted to slap the words back into their mouths.
To be honest, I am beyond shocked when I see this. I begin to wonder when and how they got the epiphany of men being victims of abuse. Many questions swirl in my mind: Why this moment? Why did they not cry about their pain before this moment women decided to speak up? Why are they desperately trying so hard to shift the focus of the conversation? Wasn’t the aim of the conversation for women to express themselves? Why the sudden awareness of men being victims of abuse? Why are they just seeing this “light”?
Patriarchy-enforced male ego won’t let most men talk about how they suffer; however, when women get expressive about their experiences, they tag along with, “men, too”.
This nonsense has to stop!
Men should let go of toxic hypermasculinity and start having their own conversations. They do not have to wait for women before they start venting. There is no use keeping quiet.
In the grand scheme of things, this patriarchal system of society puts men at a disadvantage. It makes them keep shut in the face of pain and discomfort.
Men also suffer, yea, but they do not have to cry about it the same time women come out to vent. Doing that seems as though they are desperate to brush away the dark smear of pain on our collective psyche.
P.S. Do you know that the average hetero guy gets pissed when women call out men on their BS? They be like, “You’re generalising”. We are generalising, yet they are the ones most protective of their sisters and daughters. They are probably scared other men would treat their daughters the same way they have treated other people’s daughter.
To be honest, a lot of us, women, are tired of the BS heterosexual men throw at us. We are tired!
“The truth is girls hate us, Eric. They are sick of our shit. One day, they plan to make us obsolete – stick us underground where they just milk us for our semen. Boys’ only hope is to start over on Mars.” – Butters, “South Park” Season 20, Episode Nine.
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Sunday 17 July 2016

14 Frustrating Questions People Ask You When You Graduate From University

1. What are we using to wash your degree now?

Happy Weekend happy
With which money please?

2. So what next after school now?

confused baby
Allow me serve first na.

3. You know you’re no longer a child right?

Marlon6

Somebody cannor live baby boy and baby girl life in peace again?

4. Do you even still remember what you learned in Uni?

Confused-Gary-Payton
Which one? Are we talking school theories and real life practicals?

5. Are you going to find a job with that course that you studied?

Kanye-West-011-500x300
Yes, student of Philosophy get paid jobs where they don’t have to teach…right?

6. You already know what you want to do with your life right?

Buhari-2-390x330

Do we even know who we are? Think about it.

7. You know you have to start applying for jobs before NYSC starts abi?

jay-head-scratch-o
But…? Okay.

8. Hope you know there are no jobs?

Caleon cry economy
Is that how you used to tension people?

9. Have you ever considered entrepreneurship?

palm rub

Yep. Major key.

10. So you have money you’ve been saving right?

Odunlade shock

Saving from what exactly please?

11. All your mates that are getting jobs, do they have two heads?

Dr.-Mrs-Ngozi-Okonjo-Iweala-Finance-Minister

Cold.

12. When are you starting your Masters?

Nene Leakes sleep

Is there any Master’s degree where I don’t get to study anymore?

13. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

lots-of-money-gif
“I dunno, I just want to be shiaman.” – Falz

14. When will you marry?

Kim Kardashian

Is that how you used to do?

Credit: Vibesofnaija.com
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Tuesday 7 June 2016

Kogi state university student HollyBoy Questions Yahaya Bello Action

Dear Gov. Please take your time to review my questions.

When are we going to be the number one responsibility of the govt?
When are we going to be valued as true citizens of this state?

When will the govt stop playing us like Nairabet?

How can you promise to pay ASUU in the next 10 days just to display the anxiety of your victory over the court case?

Where is the money coming from within the 10 days if you don't already have it?

Are you sure this is not a trick to discourage the peaceful protest that has been scheduled to take place as follows: 9th June and 16th June respectively?

Have you forgotten that the school is not run on a free education base?

How do you want us to remember your tenure after office?

I was so happy and full of faith for your govt. When you were declared Gov. Please don't let me down, Do the right thing and God help you through.
Amen.


#Long live KSU
#Long live Kogi State
#Long live Nigeria.


By. Hollyboy
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Saturday 4 June 2016

YOU TOO CAN BE A BOSS by Tina pearl


for over two decades Nigerian Universities Lecturers have only stressed on how best one can be an employee instead of teaching and focusing on how to enlighten and empower students to be employer, job creators instead of job seekers and this is one of the major reasons why the rate of unemployment is increasing at a very alarming rate in Nigeria. we have many people that are out there who have the skills as an employee but lack idea of job creation.
It is high time we all get our brains cracking and try and figure out how to start creating jobs instead of relying on ready made jobs. i cannot imagine myself graduating from school and be waiting for when there is a vacancy opportunity to apply for a job. Many graduates have done that for many decades and it has yielded little or no result in improving their lives and the country at large..
Though there are some many challenges facing upcoming Enterpreneurs that is not enough reason for one not to strive to take steps, because there is always a solution to every promblem.
Entrepreneurs face many challenges in today’s ultra-competitive business world; fortunately, contemporary times have also blessed entrepreneurs with more resources for tackling those problems than ever before. The following lists the “Top 10” challenges faced by entrepreneurs today, defines why each problem exists, and offers solutions so you can operate an efficient and successful business:
1. Cash flow management
The challenge: Cash flow is essential to small business survival, yet many entrepreneurs struggle to pay the bills (let alone themselves) while they’re waiting for checks to arrive. Part of the problem stems from delayed invoicing, which is common in the entrepreneurial world. You perform a job, send an invoice, then get paid (hopefully) 30 days later. In the meantime, you have to pay everything from your employees or contractors to your mortgage to your grocery bill. Waiting to get paid can make it difficult to get by – and when a customer doesn’t pay, you can risk everything.
The solution: Proper budgeting and planning are critical to maintaining cash flow, but even these won’t always save you from stressing over bills. One way to improve cash flow is to require a down payment for your products and services. Your down payment should cover all expenses associated with a given project or sale as well as some profit for you. By requiring a down payment, you can at least rest assured you won’t be left paying others’ bills; by padding the down payment with some profit, you can rest assured you can pay your own.
Another strategy for improving cash flow is to require faster invoice payments. I invoice most of my clients at 15 days, for example, which is half the typical invoice period. This means if a customer is late on payment I have two weeks to address it and get paid before the next month’s bills are due. In addition, more and more companies are requiring immediate payment upon project completion – and in our digital age when customers can pay invoices right from their mobile phones, it’s not a stretch to request immediate payment.
You can also address cash flow management from the other side of the equation by asking your own vendors to invoice you at 45, 60, or even 90 days to allow ample times for your payments to arrive and checks to clear. If you can establish a good relationship with vendors and are a good customer, they’ll be willing to work with you once you explain your strategy.
And if you’re looking for an easier way to pay bills and save money, listen to our recorded eChecks webinar!
2. Hiring employees
The challenge: Do you know who dreads job interviews the most? It’s not prospective candidates – it’s entrepreneurs. The hiring process can take several days of your time: reviewing resumes, sitting through interviews, sifting through so many unqualified candidates to find the diamonds in the rough. Then, you only hope you can offer an attractive package to get the best people on board and retain them long-term.
The solution: Be exclusive. Far too many help wanted ads are incredibly vague in terms of what qualifications candidates must have, what the job duties are, what days and hours will be worked, and what wages and benefits will be paid. You can save yourself a ton of time by pre-qualifying candidates through exclusive help wanted ads that are ultra-specific in what it takes to be hired at your firm, as well as what the day-to-day work entails. Approach your employee hunt the same way you would approach a customer-centric marketing campaign: through excellent targeting.
Once you have a pool of prospects, arrange for a “walking interview” in which you take candidates on a tour of their working environments. Ask questions relevant to the job and to candidates’ experiences, expectations, dedication, and long-term goals. Don’t act like an overlord determining which minion gets to live another day; rather, behave as though you’re seeking a partner to help you operate and grow your business.
Take the time to seek real references: not the neighbor lady your candidates grew up with, but people who can honestly attest to their work ethic and potential. Once you’ve picked a candidate and before you’ve made a job offer, ask them specifically what it will take to keep them employed with you long-term. Tell them to be honest with their expectations. Provided they do a good job for you, you’ll know what kind of rewards they’re seeking and you can make adjustments accordingly: do they want more vacation? The opportunity for advancement? More pay? Freedom from micromanagement?
This isn’t to say you have to bend backwards for your employees; however, it stands to reason that if you make expectations clear for both parties you can lay the foundation for a long-term, mutually-rewarding client-boss relationship.
3. Time management
The challenge: Time management might be the biggest problem faced by entrepreneurs, who wear many (and all) hats. If you only had more time, you could accomplish so much more!
The solution: Make time. Like money, it doesn’t grow on trees, of course, so you have to be smart about how you’re spending it. Here’s how:
Create goal lists: You should have a list of lifetime goals, broken down into annual goals, broken down into monthly goals, then broken down into weekly goals. Your weekly goals, then will be broken down into specific tasks by day. In this manner, what is on your task list in any given day is all you need to do to stay on track with your lifetime goals
If any tasks do not mesh with your goals, eliminate it or delegate them
If any tasks do not absolutely have to be completed by you, delegate them
Consistently ask yourself: “Is what I’m doing right now the absolute best use of my time?”
4. Delegating tasks
The challenge: You know you need to delegate or outsource tasks, but it seems every time you do something gets messed up and you have to redo it anyway.
The solution: Find good employees (see above) and good outsourced contract help, for starters. You might have to pay a little more for it, but the savings in time (and the resulting earning potential) more than make up for it.
Next, be ultra-specific as to what you want done. It will take a little more time at first, but write down detailed steps listing exactly what you want your help to do. Don’t make assumptions, and don’t assume your help will be able to think for themselves (they can, but they will complete the job verbatim because that’s what they’re trained to do). So, don’t say “list stats in a spreadsheet” when you can say “alphabetically list XYZ in the right spreadsheet column, then list statistic A in the next column.” It might seem like overkill, but take the time to be specific once and your help will get it right every time thereafter.
5. Choosing what to sell
The challenge: You know you could make a mint if you just knew what products and services to sell. You’re just unsure how to pick a niche.
The solution: Admit that you’re weak in identifying prosperous niches, and delegate the task to someone who is strong in this area. You don’t have to hire a huge, expensive marketing firm; rather, recruit a freelance researcher who has experience in whatever type of field you’re considering entering (retail ecommerce, service industry, publishing, etc.). Have them conduct market research and create a report with suggested niches, backed by potential profit margins and a complete SWOT analysis: Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Threats.
This isn’t to say you should have someone else decide for you; however, if you’re not good at identifying niches it’s a good idea to have someone who is make suggestions. You can then analyze the suggestions for yourself to determine if you agree. Taking this step now can save you a lot of time, money, and hassles later – and it can save your entire business and livelihood.
6. Marketing strategy
The challenge: You don’t know the best way to market your products and services: print, online, mobile, advertising, etc. You want to maximize your return on investment with efficient, targeted marketing that gets results.
The solution: Again, if you’re not adept at creating marketing plans and placing ads, it’s a good idea to outsource your marketing strategy to someone who is. At this point, all you need is a core marketing plan: what marketing activities will you undertake to motivate purchases? Give your planner a budget and tell them to craft a plan that efficiently uses that budget to produce profits.
This is not the time for experimentation. You can do that later, on your own or with the advice of your marketing strategist, after you’ve established a baseline that works.
7. Capital
The challenge: You want to start or grow your business, but you have little capital to do it with.
The solution: There are many ways to earn funding, from traditional bank loans to family and friends to Kickstarter campaigns. You can choose these routes, certainly, but I prefer the self-fueled growth model in which you fund your own business endeavors.
Instead of trying to launch a multi-million dollar corporation overnight, focus on your initial core customers. Continually work to find new customers, of course, but consistently strive to be remarkable to those customers you already serve. Word-of-mouth will spread, and more customers will come looking for you. As they do, develop systems and business processes that allow you to delegate tasks without sacrificing quality. Your business will grow slow and steady, and you’ll be able to solve problems while they’re small.
Think about where you want to be five years from now. Can you get there without help, even if you have to delay growth a bit while you’re doing it? This is the best strategy to adopt for small business entrepreneurs. If you do feel you need funding, however, be sure to consult an attorney to make sure you’re not giving up too much of your business to get it.
8. Strapped budget
The challenge: Even though cash flow is fine, it seems you never have enough in your budget to market your company to its full potential.
The solution: Unless you’re one of the Fortune 500 (and even if you are), every entrepreneur struggles with their budget. The key is to prioritize your marketing efforts with efficiency in mind – spend your money where it works – and reserve the rest for operating expenses and experimenting with other marketing methods.
Keep a close eye on your money, too: chances are, there are areas you can skim to free up more funds. Unless an expense is absolutely critical to your business and/or represents an investment with an expected return, cut it. In fact, do this exercise: see how lean you can run your business. You don’t have to actually do it, but cut everything you can and see if you still feel you can run your business (save for what you have to delegate and market with). Somewhere in between your leanest figure and your current budget is a sweet spot that will allow you to be just as effective and leave funds leftover to fuel growth.
9. Business growth
The challenge: We’re assuming you are growing, not that you can’t grow, and you’ve come to the point at which you can’t take on any more work in your current structure.
The solution: Create new processes that focus on task delegation. Many entrepreneurs, used to wearing all the hats, find themselves in this position once they’ve achieved a modicum of success. Because you’re doing everything, your growth halters to as top when it hits a self-imposed ceiling. The only way to break through is to delegate tasks to others and take yourself out of the production end and segue into management and, finally, pure ownership.
10. Self-doubt
The challenge: An entrepreneur’s life is not enviable, at least in the beginning. It’s extremely easy to get discouraged when something goes wrong or when you’re not growing as fast as you’d like. Self-doubt creeps in, and you feel like giving up.
The solution: Being able to overcome self-doubt is a necessary trait for entrepreneurs. Having a good support system will help: family and friends who know your goals and support your plight, as well as an advisory board of other entrepreneurs who can objectively opine as to the direction of your business.
One of the best ways to deal with self-doubt is to work your goals and tasks lists. When you’re down and lack motivation, look at your lists and know that the tasks you do today are contributing to your lifetime goals. By doing them, you’re one step closer, and you can rest assured that you are, indeed, on the path to business success.
Entrepreneurs face many challenges, and volumes have been written about how to overcome them. Perseverance and intelligence are your allies; use them to your advantage keep working toward your goals. Understand that you’re not the first to struggle, and because of that there are many resources available to help you get through your darkest days as an entrepreneur so you can reap the immeasurable rewards that come with building your own successful business.
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Saturday 21 May 2016

Nkem Ndem: Your Boyfriend Is NOT Your Husband


I am a huge Game of Thrones (GoT) fan, and after seeing “An hour of Ice and Fire” – last week’s episode where Khaleesi dealt with the sex-crazed and potty-mouthed khans by setting the Dothraki hut ablaze, I was filled with so much excitement that I decided to call a friend, Tiwa** to share my speculations for the next episode. As Tiwa picked up the phone and we started talking, I noticed that her responses were curt and her tone flat. I had to end all the GoT talk and ask her what was wrong. She surprisingly broke into tears and started to narrate the story of how her boyfriend had embarrassed her earlier in the day, in front of their friend.

According to Tiwa, she had gone to over to his place early in the morning to drop off the packs of food she had made for him to put in his freezer. Although she had called him before setting out and still called his phone when she got to his apartment, he had left her standing at the entrance knocking for almost 10 minutes before opening the door. It wasn’t all. After she put the bowls of food in the freezer, she headed to his room to give him a kiss before leaving as any loving girlfriend would do. On getting to his room, however, one of his friends (also a friend of hers) who had spent the weekend with him and was in the room with him, mentioned to the boyfriend that he needed to give Tiwa a key to the apartment. Before she could say a word in protest, her boyfriend of 3 solid years had already replied : “For what now? When she is not my wife?”

Of course, I couldn’t do much but just listen and sympathize with her. She had not asked for my advice and actually, I could see that she was finally at the place where she could see that her boyfriend was not in love with her. He was only stringing her along until the marriage benefits she was giving him runs out… or until he finds the benefits elsewhere.

Tiwa met him at the point in her life when she was going through the “i-want-to-get-married” phase and was a little desperate. In the bid to show him that she wife material and secure him for marriage, she started to give him the benefits of marriage: round-the-clock sex, home-cooked meals, cleaning his house, etc. Of course, we (Tiwa and I) had had fights over it all; I constantly told her that playing wife was not only inappropriate, it would take away the incentive for him to take the next step and marry her, but she wouldn’t listen.

Think about it, why marry the woman when you can get the wife for free?

In my opinion, there is a very big difference between a boyfriend and a husband – many of which circle around devotion, commitment, and understanding. The two are not interchangeable at all. If they were the same, what would be there to look forward to in marriage?

Do not get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with loving your boyfriend and giving him a measure of devoutness. Actually, the caring-for-him part is what makes the relationship fun for the woman as caregiving comes naturally to her. The problem comes when you give him all the benefits of having a wife with none of the commitment.

In fact, the root of some many problems in dating stem from the fact that most girls go above and beyond the call of duty of a girlfriend. Doing for your boyfriends, what a wife does for her husband, is not okay. If a man wants all of you and wants you to do more than a girlfriend does for her boyfriend, then he needs to put a ring on it. Until there is a ring on your finger, you should never treat him as though he is your husband.

Treating a man as though he is already a husband, with the intent of getting him to marry you, often backfires. Usually, he instead takes you for granted or walks all over you. Like…even if you go to his mother and learn how to make their village meals or you decide to not just indulge all his sexual desires but also hang your ovaries on his wall so he will know you can do anything for him, you will be disappointed to learn how easily and quickly he can leave the relati
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